catch up

No this is not a post about how I need to write about all the things we have been doing. This is how I feel every morning. Just tryin' to catch up. I'm usually up before the big kids but never before Thad. I take care of him and play with him and slowly the other 3 wake up until I am outnumbered 4 to 1. I get Levi ready for school and send him on his way and then look around me, and even if I did do the dishes last night, the kitchen is a disaster. Did I really just sweep the floor last night? Food and pencil crayons are all over the floor. The family room is a mess. There are toys everywhere. Thad's hands are super sticky, not to mention his hair. Monet's hair is even worse and looks like it has never seen a comb before. I have diapers to change. Kids to dress. Shoes to find. Beds to make (OK- only one). Highchair to wipe down. Calendar and email to check. Bank statements. Phone calls. Trampoline. Games to play. Songs to sing. I am just so popular around here EVERYONE wants me to give them my complete and undivided attention. I feel inundated with peoples needs and almost dizzy sometimes. I feel like I can't spin around fast enough to breath. Motherhood is overwhelming. To say it is busy is an understatement. I think it is slowly melting my brain into nothing.

But then there are cuddles on the couch as we read (and re-read) a favorite story. There are soccer games in the backyard. Reading and riding and loving to be taught. Tight hugs and sticky kisses. Moments where the kids actually seem to not only like but love each other. Accomplishments like using the bathroom by oneself and getting dressed. Silly songs and dances. Discovering bugs and new foods. My kids might be disintegrating my brain, but every day they find a way to melt my heart and make it all worth it.

This is not easy. It is not flashy or dazzling. But it is necessary, and as much as I think (and hope) I am building these little people into spectacular and amazing, caring, empathetic, and hard-working beings, I really think it is the other way around. How will I let my kids help mould me into something better today?